My Vision Statement.

Where's your heart? Where's your passion? Why aren't you going after the things you are called to do? 

These are the questions I've been asking myself lately. It is so easy to get caught up in life that we put our hopes, dreams, and passions to the side. Let it never be said of me- that I didn't fight for my passions. This is a vow I make to you, I will fight for my passions. I will pursue my Lord and Savior and follow Him wherever He leads me. And I will always fight for what He put in this heart. 

My heart is full and expectant for what the Lord is calling me into. I may not know the exact step I am to take- but I know it doesn't include me putting my passions on the sideline. 

My dream of becoming a wife to a honorable and holy man of God will be covered in prayer and fasting. My hopes of being a published writer on a realistic, down-to-earth, say it like it is- Purity book will be covered in hard work and direct downloads from my Abba. My life-long passion for children will be cultivated until the day that I have my own. My pursuit of being a friend- a good friend- will be spent over good food and talks about what really matters. My dream of speaking and teaching on purity and holiness will be prepared and cultivated by a life at the altar and in the secret place with my Father. It will be prepared through the small one-on-one opportunities I have to pour into others. My love for overseas missions will be a priority in my life. A priority of putting God first and others second. My heart for seeing Heaven invade earth will include boldness and living a life of prayer. My heart to see the church be the church will be soaked in a desire to break the life of mediocrity and to step into the fullness of who He is. 

This life is not my own. I plan to change things and be the best Brennen that I can be. When God speaks, I will obey. I will protect and honor the things He has placed in my life and in my heart. I will fight for the things He longs for. I will stand in the gap. I will intercede. I will love. 

I share my heart with you to urge you. Where's your heart. I want to hear it. I want to see you live it out. I want to see you fight for it. 

There is something beautiful about people attempting the impossible. There is such beauty in the attempt. Sure we may mess up and fall. Heck, I've been writing this book for a year and only have 4 pages written. That doesn't mean I throw in the towel. That means I start writing. That means I pick myself up, dust myself off, and keep walking. He's calling you forward. He's calling you to more. Where's your heart? 

I wrote this without realizing that it's my vision statement. I have sat down before to write out my vision statement and it never came out. Not until I began to write about my passions and desires did my vision / mission statement come out. Put the pen to the paper- and write out your goals, passions, and desires. You just might end up with your Vision Statement written out. 

Marriage In The Eyes of a Single Girl

     The Lord won't quit speaking to me about marriage. He keeps giving me revelations about marriage, love, dating, purity, and life. I'm not totally for sure why, but He is. It could be He wants me to start writing my book again or it could be so I can write this blog. I have no idea but I'm more than happy to hear and learn. I've prayed about and considered writing a blog about marriage for quite some time. The only reason I hesitate is because I'm not married. But, I've decided that excuses stink and I'm writing it. I thought I would share some of the things God is speaking to me about:

(this is part of my fairytale... He'll wear suspenders)

     -Your spouse is a human being. They are not perfect. Give them grace to learn and grow as a person. I am sure that I have a few fairytale mindsets when it comes to marriage. Mostly being that my husband will be the best thing ever and never make a mistake. But that's false. And in a marriage, I will have to let my husband grow into the man God is calling Him to become.
     -I must speak to His potential and not who He currently is. The reason for marriage is that two are better than one. I'm not as strong on my own as I will be with my husband. We have to let iron sharpen iron. And we also have to believe in our spouses. If you constantly speak negative things over your spouse.... then the product of that will probably be negative. It's amazing what believing in someone will do to a relationship.
     -Be on the same page. It's hard to understand something when you're at 2 different points. Look out for each other. Hold hands.
     -Love is a choice. In a marriage I will have to choose love every day. Even when I don't feel like it. I will have to come up with reasons to love him. (And probably write them down so I won't forget.)
     -Prayer. I must be on my face in intercession for my husband. Now, when we're dating and when I'm married.
     -God's eyes. How does God see my husband? That will check a lot of my awful thoughts when He isn't mowing the yard when I think He should, or saying the right thing, or doesn't want to cook.
     -Honor my husband now. The amount of honor I show towards my husband will be in direct correlation to the amount of life in our relationship. Honor brings life.
     -God first. Husband second. In that order. Always. Always. Always. My husband can't solve all my problems or complete me. Only the Lord can. I also must communicate with my husband about the passions, encounters, and sweet whispers the Lord gives me.
     -I am not his Holy Spirit. God is very capable of handling my husband's problems. Unless instructed by my Heavenly Father- I will have to keep my mouth shut.
     -Hug. Kiss. Spend Time with one another. Find a question that you can ask every day that will stir conversation. Communication. Physical Touch. Keep the passion burning.
     -Don't yell. Ever. Never even think about mentioning the D word. (divorce). (Learned that one from my parents.)
     -Stay in alignment with the Word. Keep a kingdom mentality.

I am sure that when I do get married one day, I will have to re-read this blog. I am also sure that my husband and I will not always live in a fairy tale land. Even though I think we can for some of it. It's all a matter of choice. And I will choose to love. I make that vow now. I have a few other vows that I have written out for my husband now before I've met him. I want to honor my husband even now when I'm sitting on a couch alone. One day my prince will come, and until that day, I'll pray, fast, and honor Him.

A Preview of My Book...

As I write these very words I think about my husband. It’s pretty often that the subject of love and relationships are brought up in my everyday life. I work with the public and many of them ask about my purity ring when I hand them their change. Or they want to know a little about my life and ask if I have a boyfriend. And for some reason I get nervous. I suppose it’s because I think that they won’t think I am “cool” because I’ve really never had a real boyfriend. Granted, I’ve had a few guys I’ve hung out with and spent (too much) time with, but never have I been asked,  “Will you be my girlfriend?”. So when I am asked about this subject I almost cower.  The other day I found myself doing that very thing, when I checked myself. Turned my attitude around and proudly said, “I’m waiting for my husband.”

            There is no shame in your purity.  9.5 times out of 10 after I tell someone that I have never had sex or came close to having sex they react with a great deal of respect. Shock is also normally involved in their response, and some people think I am lying. I urge you, to never, ever, do what I have done; cowering or thinking that you aren’t cool because you are waiting for your husband. You are so beyond awesome for waiting for your future spouse. And if you have messed up, no worries- there is so much grace for you. God loves you and is still proud of you. Stand up, dust yourself off, and stay pure. J

            Growing up I always wondered if something was wrong with me. I was the twin that never had the boyfriend. I would be Chelsea’s third wheel so she could hang out with her boyfriend. I would painfully stare out the window longing to be loved. I wondered if I wasn’t pretty enough, funny enough, perfect enough for someone to care about me, to love me, and to think I was awesome. I so deeply wanted someone to text me in the morning and to tell me Good Morning. And I was always so scared that I wasn’t good enough. Today I am so thankful that I was being hidden during those years (and I suppose still am being hidden). I firmly believe that the Lord was hiding me in His arms because He knew my destiny. He knew that one day I would be writing this page to a girl or boy sitting at home wondering if something is wrong with them.

            Not only did He know that part of my destiny, but He knew how proud I would be one day telling my husband that I have everything to give him. It’s all his, and I have saved it for him. He knew that my wilderness, singleness experience would make me appreciate, love, and cultivate a marriage one day. Even now, while I am in that same stage- I know that one day I will be so excited that I have a husband. And 10 years into the marriage- I’ll re-read this book and think, “I am so lucky to be married, there is someone out there that is pleading with God for this opportunity.”     

            Singleness is not a curse. It’s not always fun, but it is not the worse thing in the world. It can be very rewarding if you don’t mope around about it. Choose to have fun in life even when you are single. Don’t worry about being this perfect person so you can catch someone’s eye. Because if you get married, 15 years later- they will know you aren’t perfect. J