People let you down, you let yourself down, you make bad decisions, you make good decisions other people don't agree with, your bank account is way too low for comfort, you can't seem to find what you are supposed to do, you still live with your parents, school is almost over which means student loans are going to have to be paid, your car's AC goes out, and you feel like you can't get in your purpose. Okay, so maybe that isn't what you are going through- but that's my head right now. I'll be completely transparent with my blog readers. My life has been difficult lately. Not on the outside- but on the inside. I have had to bite my tongue, watch my actions, and constantly take thoughts captive lately. I have felt dried up. However, it isn't the normal "dried up" feeling. The one where I haven't been praying or reading my Bible and that is all that takes to fix it. But a "dried up" to reality kind of dried up. I'm at the end of myself in making decisions on my life. And I'm really not sure where I'm supposed to go, what I'm supposed to do, or how I am supposed to do it.
I know what I'm supposed to do- it's just a matter of doing it. It'd be much easier to run away, quit, and give up- but it's sticking it out and figuring it out through listening to the Lord that I need to do. I'm not really for sure the protocol for fixing a bumpy road other than Jesus. I have to keep my Yes to the Lord so loud that I don't have to worry about saying no to the things of the world. (Damon Thompson tidbit) I have to keep pressing on doing the things that I know the Lord has told me to do. I have to keep in His Word. Keep praying. Keep seeking the Lord's face.
The other day I was working out the whole broken AC in my car ordeal and I kept hearing the Lord say, "My grace is sufficient." (And it totally is). What I had forgotten was what else accompanied that excerpt from scripture. The entire verse goes on to say that His power is made perfect in weakness. That is exactly what I have to keep telling myself.... His power can come through me when I am weak. So with that- I will rejoice in the fact that I am a human. I am in a season of my life where I'm not at my strongest- but the Lord can be strong for me. He can handle my battles. He can handle my weakness. He isn't scared of me.... He just wants to see me grow. Just like He is pushing you to be a better you- He is pushing Brennen to be the best Brennen I can be. We are never to a point where we can throw in the towel. We gotta keep moving, keep pressing, and keep seeking.
There is grace in growth.
Grace. Grace. Grace.
I end this blog with a quote from a movie I watched today, Soul Surfer, "When you get in the impact zone, get back up, because you never know what is over the next wave."