First week... CHECK.

Uh... where did week 1 go? It went by insanely fast- and I like that, it's crazy how much I have already grown in one week. My faith has increased.. the Lord is faithful with BIG and small. Sometimes we forget that he can handle the little things like: bad internet, hot and humid days, spilled water on computers, ants, lizards, jumping spiders, sticky nights.... things like that. :) I love this time I am getting to spend with the Lord, it is so awesome. He is so amazing, he proves himself true day after day- hour after hour. I am so blessed by my DTS team, we all speak English and vary from the ages of 18 to 43, oh and a 16 month old ;). And everyone is hilarious... I have never laughed so hard in my life... we are a group of 14 from California, Georgia, Minnesota, Kentucky, Idaho, Norway, Holland, Michigan... we all come from different backgrounds but all have the same goal in mind- increased faith. Today was our last day with the subject of Hearing God.. we decided to go to the city and walk. We were paired up, I was paired with Jan from Holland... we walked for 30 minutes simply observing then we went and prayed together about what we saw. What we saw was emptiness- people yearning for more.. more money, more money, more glitter... but their hearts desire, even if they don't know it now, is for the love of Christ. Jan and I prayed together that their deepest hearts desire would be fulfilled, Isaiah 43 was also laid on my heart during that time- take some time and check it out.. Once everyone was back together we shared with one another, we had 2 guys come up to us and tell us that they could tell we were Christians and that they as well were Christians working with the children who were gangsters and went around killing each other. We got the chance to pray for them as a group. The Lord works in mysterious ways- and I was blessed by that opportunity. 

This afternoon we got some time as a team and individually to listen to God as we worshipped, prayed, and sought God's will. During this time God brought some things up that I was ignoring, but things that are holding me back in my relationship with Christ. I am learning that it's okay to be angry, to be upset.. cry when we need to cry... but there is also a time of rejoicing that those times may come but our Heavenly Father is holding us. I got to experience both of those times. My team is so awesome, people praying for one another, lifting each other up, speaking words of encouragement to each other. Simply beautiful.  I love my team, and I love what God is doing with us. 

Be encouraged that your prayers are being felt. Continue to pray. We all need them. I love all of you all. Xoxo. 

Fun... and humid

Panama life is tons of fun but totally humid the majority of the time.. suprisingly right now I am actually wearing jeans.. it is still like 70ish I really am not for sure, but it rained alllll morning- so that cooled it off- which I totally loved the rain. We have tin roofs so it makes me think I am at the cabin. :) Yesterday was lots of fun- we had "DTS recreation" which consisted of us playing soccer on a red clay "field". Our group had loads of fun, and I, of course, was SOAKED in sweat after we were done. We also played some group games during our class time. The Lord is continuing to speak to each of us, last night we got a chance to go to the city where we could see the city line and the water and have a time of worship. We prayed for the city and for lives to be blessed by the presence of the Lord. And this morning during our base intercession time I had a a vision of a multitude of Panamanians running towards the city to be in His presence. So that is something that you can begin to pray for that, that God will reveal what he meant for me to hear during that vision. I love our intercession time, it is such a faith builder. We learned yesterday that if we aren't faithful with the little things then how can God expect us to be faithful on the big things.. so little by little we are learning things that we have been unfaithful with to God. It is crazy how intense this is.. but I love every minute of it. I also forgot to say that during our first ministry prep time we got to make up a skit- and let me say, I haven't laughed that hard in quite some time. My group did a replay of the bus we caught to come back to the base Sunday afternoon.. So I was the coca cola/agua/DVD "seller" who came on the "bus" yelling, "Agua, Agua, anyone wanna buy some agua? Es mas frio!" We had a blast.. I love it. Anyways- on the more serious side... things you can pray for:

-The Lord to continue to speak to our group in bold ways.

-The Lord to being to speak to us on where we need to do our outreach.

-For me to become aware of the sin in my life that is holding me back from being the best that I can be.

-For me to begin to let go of some things and some relationships that are holding me back.

-For our DTS group to bond.

-For Marisol, the baby of our group, she has been running a temperature- so for healing.

-That the Lord will be the center of our attention at all time. 

I love all of you.. Please e-mail me---> brennen_gaddis@yahoo.com with any prayer requests or anything :) Love you!

A day in the life..

So the DTS has now begun, we have started our classes and activities that will continue throughout the DTS. We start every morning out with breakfast at 7, individual devotions from 7:30 to 8:30, Worship or Intercession time, Class, lunch, ministry prep, work duties, supper, free time then lights out.. except on Wednesday nights we have base worship in the evenings.. We have more freedom than I thought we would, we are required to be at all classes and all of that but during free time we can leave the base (in pairs) to go shopping, do laundry, or whatever! 

I have enjoyed our class this week, the topic is Hearing God and Kenneth from Costa Rica is our teacher. (He reminds me of Mr. Phillip from Gulf Shores!) The main things that have stuck out to me these past 2 classes is that God WANTS to speak to us even in the midst of our sin, he also loves us and claims us. And it blows my mind that he will claim us (Exodus 16) even though we are so messed up and so stuck in our nasty sin but yet sometimes we find it difficult or embarassing to claim that Jesus is our Lord.. and He is perfect. It blows me away. 

The Lord has spoken to me several times already since I have been here. Today during our intercession time I saw a picture of my sin on the cross, then the cross falling and burning the sin off... and I heard the gentle whisper from the Lord saying, "Daughter, you are loved and forgiven." What was crazy was that before we started praying the cross that was in the room, which was a very large one was standing against the wall, but during our intercession time someone had laid it on the ground.. so when I was sharing with our group I pointed to it and realized that the cross was on the ground. How awesome is that? To hear the voice of the Lord then for him to confirm it in his own unique and personal way for me. I am so blessed to have heard his voice. I think it was time for me to be still and start listening. 

I am praying for all of you and that each of you will begin to listen for the voice of God.. he wants us to know him and to listen and engage in conversation with him. 

Anyways, that is all I have time to share for now, but on a lighter note I thought I would share a funny "rule" we have around the base.... If it's yellow, let it mellow; if it's brown, flush it down. Hahaha.. Makes me laugh everytime. :) Adios friends and familia. 

Much better.

Oh Panama. I have only been here 2 days and 3 nights and it has already been an experience. Thursday, the first morning, I was ready to go home, I thought that this wasn't for me and I misread the Lord's will for my life. And I now know why I felt like that... satan is out to kill, steal, and destroy any experience that will bring me closer to the Lord, which is exactly what Panama DTS is doing to my life. I am beginning to see that my prayers are being answered- I am having to fully trust Christ for everything. So today (Friday) was a much better day. 

We started today off with a lovely breakfast, which of course I didn't eat. Then we had a worship time, which was totally needed for me.. I was longing for that time where I could just sing and worship to my Savior. We also got to hear and give our testimonies of how we got to Panama and also how we met the Lord. I am so blessed to be with this group. There are so many awesome stories within our classmates. 

Some left everything they had, they quit their jobs, sold their houses and cars, and bought a 1 way ticket to Panama.. how amazing is that. I am blessed so much to be around people that have that kind of faith! Our group is seriously a funny group.. I have laughed so much today.. which is totally what I needed. Laughter cures mostly everything. :) We all are so different but we have one purpose and that is to serve our Lord. 

Tonight, I got a little taste of home! We went out to dinner to a nice restraunt and guessss what? I ATE! Yep, that's right, my appetite is back. Praise the Lord. What was so funny was that I kept looking for our cell phone to see if I had a text. Isn't that horrible? I am so immuned to the culture of busy busy busy that I don't even realize how much I am dependent on my phone and the technology. Of course, I didn't have my cell phone... I wonder how many cell phones I'll loose once I get back to the States? Haha.

Anyways- thanks for the prayers.. I can feel them! The Holy Spirit is going to do wonders.. I can't wait. I am praying for you all back home as well! 

I'm writing this Friday night but I'll try and post it soon- I am not where there is WiFi.. ;) Love to all! 

-b

Post 2 in 1 post :)

It's Saturday night right now.. and we have gone to the beach today! :) It was lots of fun, good bonding time for the group.. and once again lots of laughs! Tomorrow we get to go to a church in the city- so that should be fun as well.. Just wanted to let everyone know I am doing better.. I have been eating today tambien.. just ate 3 cookies :)

Love all of you all!

Estoy aqui.

I made it to Panama, nothing too exciting happened on my last flight except I met a guy who is doing the DTS at the airport, his name is Eric. So we helped each other out through tourist cards, customs, and him helping me with my bags. Which I of course overpacked... my roommates are amazed at the amount of t-shirts I have! One of my bags was 80 pounds and the other was 49.5 which made the cut while the other one did not! I am in a room with 7 other girls and it is alot like Camp Shaefer except no air conditioning. We get a fan that blows on us and makes the world of difference. This morning when I woke up I did not have the same attitude as I did yesterday about my nerves, I was ready to turn around get on that plane and come home. And parts of me still are. I need lots of prayer that I will begin to feel at home and that these nerves will STOP. I threw up this morning and still have yet to eat anything.. so it really is not healthy at all. So please pray.. I also met a girl named Katie who is 25 and from LA! We both had the same thoughts this morning consisting of- "I can't do this" "I am crazy for coming here for 5 months" "maybe I can just stay for 2 weeks" "I wannnnnna go homeeee" but we made a pack that together we will get through this.. and that through these trials we will be so glad we persevered! The base is absolutely beautiful.. maybe soon I will have some pictures.. today we have a free day so we are getting things organized and just learning about each other. Keep praying for me, I need those more than you could ever imagine. Love you all. -B

Pre Panama flight

Oh wow, what an adventure... as of right now I am still in the States, I am waiting on my final flight to Panama City, Panama and it already has been crazy! I made it to all of my gates with absolutely 0 problems, I rode on 2 small planes so I am hoping that this next one will be bigger! I have been extremely nervous, consisting of passing out once (before church on Sunday) then throwing up Sunday, then on Monday and Tuesday throwing up as well.. and today I did as well! Haha. It has been crazy- but who am I to not suffer? We all will face trials, and the other night I was reminded of the beauty in the trials in the book James. I was reminded that through trials I develop steadfastness or perseverance and through that comes joy. So that is how I am looking at these nerves- they will only make me stronger! 

My first flight I met a man named Eric who is 30, and is also going to Panama City- except he didn't get the joy of going to Newark before his flight to Panama.. however I was able to share with him what I am doing and he shared a piece of Orbit chewing gum that DIDN'T make me throw up. (Praise the Lord.) And then the second trip I talked to another man after the fact of me being one of the last ones on the plane (not my fault), so everyone on that flight got the joy of watching little me try to put my STUFFED and heavy backpack in the carryon area... needless to say that man was cracking up. And I was able to share with him what I was doing as well, he was from New Jersey and wasn't extremely friendly but he was pretty nice to me! :) 

So now I am sitting here amazed that all these people are going to the same destination, but with totally different reasons. This morning I doubted if I have the ability to do this, and it just came to me that I do not have the ability, but the Lord has the ability to strengthen me, comfort me, love me, and use me. It is absolutely nothing of me but all of him. Because if it was me, I would have already turned around and headed back to Owensboro to stay in my comfort zone. 

Now lets see how I feel once I get there :). Thank you for your prayers- they have gotten me this far, so I am confident that they will get me to Panama as well. 

New set of nerves?

Wow, I leave in the morning for 5 months. THAT is insane. My nerves are shot, I have passed out, threw up, and cried a ton. I haven't eaten anything today, so you know I am not myself. But I still know that this is what God wants for me, I am out of my comfort zone, and I think that is where God has called all of us to be! Anyways- I wanted to thank you all in advance for sending me on my adventure- I would not be boarding the 3 planes tomorrow without your prayers and financial support! Thank you! Continue to pray for these good ol' nerves.. that they will settle down while I am traveling. I will be flying out of Louisville at 10:45, out of Chicago at 12:25, and out of Newark at 5:20 hopefully arriving to Panama at 9:40. 

Also many people have asked for my address so here it is:

Juventud Con Una Mision

Apartado 0850-00212

Panama, Rep de Panama

Feel free to write me, I enjoy getting mail :).. and if you want you can send some index cards with verses on them! 

You can search me on skype at brennen_gaddis@yahoo.com

My thing is just brennengaddis!

I will thrive off of your prayers- Pray that I will represent my Savior well! 

18 is a difficult age.

So I am extremely bummed because I just looked up on how to get a "buddy" at the airport... and you have to be 14 or younger. How lame is that? So I get to be a big girl and grow up (I've been doing too much of that lately) and get from gate to gate on my own.. Lord help me. :)

Praise the Lord.

I am so behind on updating this blog, I apologize! I am now a week away from my adventure/journey to Panama! It is crazy exciting and totally scary at the same time. I know that I am going to really learn what it means to depend on God and to love him with my whole heart. He has had His hand on this the entire time and I am extremely blessed for that. Over $2,500+  has came in from friends, family and the church. I am so thankful that God provided the money for everyone that has helped to bless me financially. I am extremely overwhelmed with the way he provides once again. Any money that comes in now will go to help me with my neccessities (groceries, laundry, taxi, etc...) and plane ticket money for outreach (if needed) or to other "YWAMers"!

One thing that I would love from friends and family is index cards with bible verses on them. Ones that have helped you all through rough, happy, sad, difficult, exciting, life changing times. Also any books, bible studies, things like that would be nice as well. I really am excited to get there and really do it! 

Prayer Requests: 

God's peace to overwhelm me, to meet good friends that will encourage me on my "team", wisdom for my group, patience for me, and that I don't miss any flights when flying! (I stop at 2 large airports- I am going to try and get a "buddy" :) 18 isn't too old is it for one of those?)

Thank you all very very much for everything!