Giving

I absolutely love a giving heart. It amazes and humbles me. It's pretty easy to give when things are going great... but not so easy when you're penny pinching. This season is all about giving.... I follow an amazing photographer on facebook and she has decided to giveaway a camera. This amazes me... and excites me. Part of the reason for this blog post is so I can be entered to win. But the fact that she is giving a camera away also teaches me. It reminds me of how much fun giving can be. And also reminds me of how Christ gave himself to us. So much more to life than just going through the motions. Life is about making a difference. Jesus didn't die on the cross for us to sit back and go through the 9-5 white picket fence mumbo jumbo of life. He died so that we could have life and have it abundantly.

So live it up! Make a difference in someone's life today. Just like Oh So Posh Photography is. :) And.... pray that I win! :) I've been needing a new camera for a while.

You can visit her facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/OhSoPoshPhotography.

Her actions are pretty awesome.. I've been wanting to buy some recently. :)

Hurtful Words

I realized a few things tonight. For the past few months I have not been myself, or I have not been the best version of myself. I blame it on no one but myself. Truth: You decide how happy/ fulfilled/ and awesome your life is. Circumstances don't define it. Your attitude and choices do. I reaLized that I allowed someone to define me. I allowed this one persons hurtful words to mold my life. The words cut me to the core speaking directly to my fears. fears of being too young, not good enough, and never being able to be "make the cut". The words that were spoken didn't come out like that word for word. But they cut me to the core... And I allowed them to form an infected wound. Instead of standing on God's words about me- I allowed someone else's words to rule my life. Tonight- I believe that the Lord spoke to me. He told me that He would bring me through the fire and into the rain. And that He had my heart in mind. And He does. He believes in me, He doesn't see the age of 21 as a hinderence. He chooses me and wants to use me. Don't allow someone's words that have cut you down to shape who you become. Decide who you want to be... And be! You can be totally awesome and the best version of yourself if you choose to. Hold your chin up, and keep marching forward.

Say What You Need To Say.

     My heart is heavy while I write this blog post. Last night, I watched a movie (that I boo-hooed in the entire time) about parents loosing a child in a car wreck. Today, I heard about a young man in a high school that passed away. This world is not perfect and it doesn't always makes sense or seem fair. There are parts of it that hurt and tear at your heart. 

     I think that we can do a lot with the time that we do have with one another. Like John Mayer says, "Say what you need to say." Tell those around you how you feel. Tell them that you love them. Tell them they are pretty. Tell them that you like how they laugh. Tell them that the thought of loving them scares you. Or that you can't imagine not having them in your life. Tell them you could hug them all day. Tell them the things that you love about them. Tell them that you believe in them. Tell them......... that you care. 

     I never want to say that I didn't say what means the most. I never want people in my life to not know that I love, care, believe, and adore them. My life may hurt sometimes and things may not seem fair... but my words can change someone elses day. Be honest. Make the most of each and every day with those that you love. Love makes this world spin.... and it makes hearts full. 

Love. Tell that you love. Share that you love. Love. 

Rate This Rating Systems

I just spent some time flipping through random albums on iTunes. Randomly, I get in a mood where I want to find the underdog in the music industry and support them. The search began- previewing began- and then I ventured into the Customer Ratings section. I've decided- I don't like that section. It doesn't give you a chance to form your own opinion.  You already have preconceived ideas/ thoughts about that artist before you have even listened to 2 songs.

Sometimes, life is the same way. We are so eager to get everyone's opinions on what is going on in our lives that we never step back and form our own. We judge a book by it's cover. We won't take the time to peel back the layers and invest in getting to know someone, an organization, a product, or a group of people. What would happen if the 5 star rating system never came about? Sure, we'd have a few bad experiences. But what if, we found something so special and quaint that would have otherwise been overlooked because someone that came from a different path of life, different belief systems, different personality said they didn't like it.

I mean, I'm just saying. It's so hard for me to like things sometimes because I know other people don't. Reality! That is dumb. It's dumb that I let other people's opinions affect what music I like. This goes much farther than music. What about the guy at the lunch table that sits by himself? I know in high school I ignored him because I didn't want to "look" stupid. I don't even talk to the people that I might have "looked" stupid to. Now I not only look stupid but am stupid for not investing in his life.

The point is- stop rating people, organizations, products and invest in them. Invest the time to get to know them, allow grace for them to fail, and support them. Everyone needs someone to believe in them. You never know where these people will end up. There is something so beautiful and unique inside every individual.... sometimes it takes someone else taking the time to unveil it.

My Vision Statement.

Where's your heart? Where's your passion? Why aren't you going after the things you are called to do? 

These are the questions I've been asking myself lately. It is so easy to get caught up in life that we put our hopes, dreams, and passions to the side. Let it never be said of me- that I didn't fight for my passions. This is a vow I make to you, I will fight for my passions. I will pursue my Lord and Savior and follow Him wherever He leads me. And I will always fight for what He put in this heart. 

My heart is full and expectant for what the Lord is calling me into. I may not know the exact step I am to take- but I know it doesn't include me putting my passions on the sideline. 

My dream of becoming a wife to a honorable and holy man of God will be covered in prayer and fasting. My hopes of being a published writer on a realistic, down-to-earth, say it like it is- Purity book will be covered in hard work and direct downloads from my Abba. My life-long passion for children will be cultivated until the day that I have my own. My pursuit of being a friend- a good friend- will be spent over good food and talks about what really matters. My dream of speaking and teaching on purity and holiness will be prepared and cultivated by a life at the altar and in the secret place with my Father. It will be prepared through the small one-on-one opportunities I have to pour into others. My love for overseas missions will be a priority in my life. A priority of putting God first and others second. My heart for seeing Heaven invade earth will include boldness and living a life of prayer. My heart to see the church be the church will be soaked in a desire to break the life of mediocrity and to step into the fullness of who He is. 

This life is not my own. I plan to change things and be the best Brennen that I can be. When God speaks, I will obey. I will protect and honor the things He has placed in my life and in my heart. I will fight for the things He longs for. I will stand in the gap. I will intercede. I will love. 

I share my heart with you to urge you. Where's your heart. I want to hear it. I want to see you live it out. I want to see you fight for it. 

There is something beautiful about people attempting the impossible. There is such beauty in the attempt. Sure we may mess up and fall. Heck, I've been writing this book for a year and only have 4 pages written. That doesn't mean I throw in the towel. That means I start writing. That means I pick myself up, dust myself off, and keep walking. He's calling you forward. He's calling you to more. Where's your heart? 

I wrote this without realizing that it's my vision statement. I have sat down before to write out my vision statement and it never came out. Not until I began to write about my passions and desires did my vision / mission statement come out. Put the pen to the paper- and write out your goals, passions, and desires. You just might end up with your Vision Statement written out. 

Grace in Growth.

     Life is not always easy. In fact- life involves change, transition, and sometimes a few bumps along the way. I'm not necessarily used to bumps that clog my mind up. Of course, problems come up- but I can normally make a decision and be on with it. However, I have found myself in a series of "bumps" where I seem to constantly be in a battle in my head. If that doesn't make sense to you, let me keep explaining.
     People let you down, you let yourself down, you make bad decisions, you make good decisions other people don't agree with, your bank account is way too low for comfort, you can't seem to find what you are supposed to do, you still live with your parents, school is almost over which means student loans are going to have to be paid, your car's AC goes out, and you feel like you can't get in your purpose. Okay, so maybe that isn't what you are going through- but that's my head right now. I'll be completely transparent with my blog readers. My life has been difficult lately. Not on the outside- but on the inside. I have had to bite my tongue, watch my actions, and constantly take thoughts captive lately. I have felt dried up. However, it isn't the normal "dried up" feeling. The one where I haven't been praying or reading my Bible and that is all that takes to fix it. But a "dried up" to reality kind of dried up. I'm at the end of myself in making decisions on my life. And I'm really not sure where I'm supposed to go, what I'm supposed to do, or how I am supposed to do it.
     I know what I'm supposed to do- it's just a matter of doing it. It'd be much easier to run away, quit, and give up- but it's sticking it out and figuring it out through listening to the Lord that I need to do. I'm not really for sure the protocol for fixing a bumpy road other than Jesus. I have to keep my Yes to the Lord so loud that I don't have to worry about saying no to the things of the world. (Damon Thompson tidbit) I have to keep pressing on doing the things that I know the Lord has told me to do. I have to keep in His Word. Keep praying. Keep seeking the Lord's face.
     The other day I was working out the whole broken AC in my car ordeal and I kept hearing the Lord say, "My grace is sufficient." (And it totally is). What I had forgotten was what else accompanied that excerpt from scripture. The entire verse goes on to say that His power is made perfect in weakness. That is exactly what I have to keep telling myself.... His power can come through me when I am weak. So with that- I will rejoice in the fact that I am a human. I am in a season of my life where I'm not at my strongest- but the Lord can be strong for me. He can handle my battles. He can handle my weakness. He isn't scared of me.... He just wants to see me grow. Just like He is pushing you to be a better you- He is pushing Brennen to be the best Brennen I can be. We are never to a point where we can throw in the towel. We gotta keep moving, keep pressing, and keep seeking.

There is grace in growth.
Grace. Grace. Grace.

I end this blog with a quote from a movie I watched today, Soul Surfer, "When you get in the impact zone, get back up, because you never know what is over the next wave."

Restoration and Downtown Buildings

     I have two of the coolest bosses in Owensboro. (Actually, in the world.) Larry and Rosemary Conder. Two of the sweetest and most generous people I have met. I admire them for so much and one thing that they do (that is so cool) is they restore downtown buildings. They take run down, beaten up, nasty buildings and turn them into something beautiful. They are rebuilding quite a few buildings downtown for business and condo/apartments currently in Owensboro. Everything that they work on downtown ends up absolutely beautiful and accomplished in excellence.
     I was thinking this week on how great of a job they do at restoring buildings and the Lord spoke to me and said, "Nothing is too old, beaten down, or ugly to restore." It hit me. Nothing is too difficult for the Lord. While the Conder's specialize in buildings the Lord specializes in people. He can take the most rotten individual and with enough work, rebuilding, and change  they have the possibility of turning into delightful individuals. He believes in you and sees your potential. Psalm 51:7 says, "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow." The Lord desires to restore his children. He wants to see them come back into His plan, be cleaned out, wiped clean, and given an opportunity to shine. He wants His children to shine. When Rosemary goes and looks at a building I am sure she doesn't think, "What can I do with these broken windows and walls with holes." Instead she thinks, "These windows can be replaced with some windows I saw the other day that were so pretty. We can move that wall this way so we can build an apartment."
     We need to see the potential in ourselves and begin a walk of rebuilding and restoration. I don't have a 5 step plan..... I just know to seek God, pray, and marinate yourself with His scriptures. It's never too late to turn into something beautiful. Not for a building, and not even for a person. Now is the time.

While working at the coffeehouse, the Conders have taught me several things. I thought I'd share! :)

1. Always look at potential and not what you initially see. 

2. Hard work pays off.

3. Give generously.

4. It's okay to have maintenance work. Just fix it right the second time. 

5. Work hard. You are never too dressed up to work hard. (I have watched Rosemary work in heels and Sorreli jewlery. Impressive.)

6. You just do what you have to do. They never relent, even when they are sleepy. 

7. Love the people around you. Rebuilding buildings isn't worth it without loving the people that come into them afterwards. 

8. Help others accomplish their dreams. I've been blessed with Rosemary in my life- she pushes me to get out of my comfort zone and excel in the things I'm called to. 

9. Share your stories and laugh. 

10. Enjoy life. See the good in every situation. 

Burn.

     The world does not need you to be an every-day "American" Christian. The mundane, medirocre and sad excuse for Christianity must end. This world doesn't need it. It's actually hurting it more than it is helping the world. The world needs you on fire for the things of God. They need you to be burning. They need you to be passionate. They need to see you live out a relentless pursuit for the things of God. The glory of God must be our focus. And if you can say you are pursuing that while marking off your check-list of "I didn't cuss today. Check. I didn't get drunk today. Check. I kept my cool instead of socking a guy in the face. Check." Those days are over. It doesn't pass for enough for God.
     Actually, God detests it. If you are living a mediocre lifestyle for God- he isn't pleased one bit. He actually wants to throw you up. (Rev. 3:16) I am so sick of being scared of being a "fanatic" for the Lord. I refuse to step down to the world's standard of Christian. I refuse to sit in the same seat every week, putting a polite smile on my face, and clapping at the good performance, and shaking hands and living a mundane & boring lifestyle. Damon Thompson hits on this a lot.... and since I've been listening to his podcasts quite frequently that's probably where this stems from. But- he says this often, "God is not boring. You are boring." How can the God of this universe who created stars and people be boring? He can't! He isn't! He is not boring!
     Once you begin to taste the reality of who God is, hear His whispers in Your ears, live a life of faith and stepping into the things He has for you, and ultimately laying your life down so that He can lift you up and pull you into a life that is better than any high from this world- you will realize that He isn't boring.
     The only way I know how to tell you to start to burn is to choose to burn. If you haven't been in church or been in the word in a while that's fine..... dry wood burns better. You have to simply begin to pursue the Living God. Get in His word. Surround yourself with people that burn. (There's a whole group at PromiselandMetro Church :D) Worship Him. Find Him in the everyday things.
     That's my favorite thing about Him. He is in my everyday activities. He speaks to me through every-day life. He can make food an analogy of the things of God to me. I can run into a door and He'll speak to me. You can read about it here.
     The bottom line is this. Jesus and His disciples were not ordinary people. They didn't get up, go to work, come home, sleep and repeat. They lived it out. They couldn't contain themselves. They laid hands on the sick- and they were healed. They fed the hungry. Clothed the naked. They loved to do the work of the Father. They served. Your works don't save you- but they could touch someone else who ends up falling in love with their Creator because they saw you live it out.
     Once you start to burn. Burn confidently. Your confidence in your burning will push others into burning. They will see that you can burn, be a crazy person that loves the Lord, be a fanatic, be  radical and still be confident. You don't have to hide the fact that you love the Lord.

     Burn!!! The worlds needs you to burn for the things of God. They need to see that God is who He says He is and that He will do what He says He will do. They need to know who to go to for answers. They'll go to the burning ones- because they know they can count on them to be on their faces in prayer for them in times of need and trouble. And that they will be beside them rejoicing in the good times. Get on fire! Live it out.

Basketball & Snickers. Just Believe.

     I am so blessed by some of the connections I have, especially blessed by my connection to Madison, Mississippi. Two weeks ago I took off on my summer adventure. Camp Leader for RAMP for Metro's youth for the first of the week then jumping on a flight to come to Mississippi to help out THE Terre Jasper. THE Terre Jasper is the Children's Pastor for Pinelake Church in MS, she was also my youth leader at Bellevue for my entire Middle and High school years. I came to MS to visit, but also to help out with her Kids Week. My life is forever changed.
     I have grown up in church and have been on plenty of mission trips and helped out with numerous camps an I have found that it's normally one child that changes my life. And that's exactly what happened this week. His name will remained unmentioned. But he was not my easiest child, he was actually my most difficult. He didn't behave, he had a bad attitude, and he didn't have a respect for authority. All three of those things clash BIG time with me. After the first day I was pretty frustrated that he was on my basketball team with 6 other 2nd/3rd graders. The Lord spoke to me while attempting to punish him and told me to not give up.
     I began to disect and pick apart his actions and behavior. After he bit my assistant coach, I decided it was time to chat. I began to ask him about his home life.... and it finally hit me. He was always acting defeated because he grows up in an atmosphere where no one believes in him. Tears were at the edge of my eyeballs and instead of making him sit out, I made him hug me. Not a short hug. But a hug. A hug from your g-ma that hasn't seen ya in a while. I hugged, hugged, and hugged the poor child. He looked at me and said, "Miss. Brennen, why you hugging me!?" And I told him I loved him and believed in him.

Everyone needs someone to believe in them. Everyone needs someone to love them. 

     That's what this precious child taught me. I ended up bribing him to behave. I have no idea if that was the correct thing to do, but he was amazed that I would spend a dollar on a yellow snickers. Bless his heart, he couldn't make it the last day and didn't even get it. But, I hope that I left him with something way better than a Snickers. (You know that's gotta be good.) I pray I left him with hope and that he knows someone believes in him. Even if they live in Ky. You better believe that on our last day together when he improved  17 points on his "HotShot" score I was jumping up and down like a proud momma.

Who are you believing in? Who was the last person you hugged and told them how much they meant to you? Reach out. Three days of playing basketball with a child who doesn't behave changed my life.

Marriage In The Eyes of a Single Girl

     The Lord won't quit speaking to me about marriage. He keeps giving me revelations about marriage, love, dating, purity, and life. I'm not totally for sure why, but He is. It could be He wants me to start writing my book again or it could be so I can write this blog. I have no idea but I'm more than happy to hear and learn. I've prayed about and considered writing a blog about marriage for quite some time. The only reason I hesitate is because I'm not married. But, I've decided that excuses stink and I'm writing it. I thought I would share some of the things God is speaking to me about:

(this is part of my fairytale... He'll wear suspenders)

     -Your spouse is a human being. They are not perfect. Give them grace to learn and grow as a person. I am sure that I have a few fairytale mindsets when it comes to marriage. Mostly being that my husband will be the best thing ever and never make a mistake. But that's false. And in a marriage, I will have to let my husband grow into the man God is calling Him to become.
     -I must speak to His potential and not who He currently is. The reason for marriage is that two are better than one. I'm not as strong on my own as I will be with my husband. We have to let iron sharpen iron. And we also have to believe in our spouses. If you constantly speak negative things over your spouse.... then the product of that will probably be negative. It's amazing what believing in someone will do to a relationship.
     -Be on the same page. It's hard to understand something when you're at 2 different points. Look out for each other. Hold hands.
     -Love is a choice. In a marriage I will have to choose love every day. Even when I don't feel like it. I will have to come up with reasons to love him. (And probably write them down so I won't forget.)
     -Prayer. I must be on my face in intercession for my husband. Now, when we're dating and when I'm married.
     -God's eyes. How does God see my husband? That will check a lot of my awful thoughts when He isn't mowing the yard when I think He should, or saying the right thing, or doesn't want to cook.
     -Honor my husband now. The amount of honor I show towards my husband will be in direct correlation to the amount of life in our relationship. Honor brings life.
     -God first. Husband second. In that order. Always. Always. Always. My husband can't solve all my problems or complete me. Only the Lord can. I also must communicate with my husband about the passions, encounters, and sweet whispers the Lord gives me.
     -I am not his Holy Spirit. God is very capable of handling my husband's problems. Unless instructed by my Heavenly Father- I will have to keep my mouth shut.
     -Hug. Kiss. Spend Time with one another. Find a question that you can ask every day that will stir conversation. Communication. Physical Touch. Keep the passion burning.
     -Don't yell. Ever. Never even think about mentioning the D word. (divorce). (Learned that one from my parents.)
     -Stay in alignment with the Word. Keep a kingdom mentality.

I am sure that when I do get married one day, I will have to re-read this blog. I am also sure that my husband and I will not always live in a fairy tale land. Even though I think we can for some of it. It's all a matter of choice. And I will choose to love. I make that vow now. I have a few other vows that I have written out for my husband now before I've met him. I want to honor my husband even now when I'm sitting on a couch alone. One day my prince will come, and until that day, I'll pray, fast, and honor Him.

"Jesus, What are YOU doing!?"

     "Jesus... what are You doing?" was the question I jotted down in my journal today. Sometimes in life things come in it that you just wonder what God has up His sleeve. That's what is going on in my life. This past week has been a week full of encounters with Him. He is stretching me, asking me to dream bigger, think larger, and be bolder. He's bringing things into my life that I "wonder" about. It's so easy to try and dissect every little thing and try to figure it all out. But, what good will that do? None.... I simply must come to a place of absolute trust.
     A friend recently told me, "Absolute trust = Absolute peace". Ah, the truth that is in that statement! If I am worrying over every little thing and trying to manipulate things into happening the way I see fit- I am not trusting. Therefore, I live in a chaotic mind set. A chaotic mindset is not aligning me to hear from the Lord.
     I want to always position myself to be able to hear from the Lord. So many times I catch myself complaining to my friends, "I'm just not hearing the Lord speak." How wrong am I!? So wrong. Either He IS speaking and my chaotic mind isn't listening. Or, He's already told me something and I haven't been obedient.
     Last month, the Lord spoke very clearly to me and told me to give a young girl in the church something. I shut it off and said no way. Last week, He told me again. This time, I obeyed. In that month- I was not hearing from the Lord. Since last Tuesday when I stepped out in obedience- I can not get enough of the Presence of God. He's been speaking to me.... that's just one testimony of when you obey the Lord you are aligning yourself to receive from Him. We have to be in alignment with His word and His kingdom. Pastor Jeff does such a great job at explaining this, I may have to get him to write a "blog" for me about it. :)
     Back to what God is doing in our lives. Stop worrying, He has it under control. It's so good to hear that sometimes. To be reminded of His faithfulness. He knows us better than we know ourselves. He doesn't withhold any good thing from us. He gives us the desires of our hearts.
     I was reading Psalms 103-105 today and I wanted to share a few truths from it:

104:27 God will give us our food at the proper time. Check out that verse! The hungry get fed!

104:30 He renews the Earth with His spirit. +Get in His presence, there is renewing. 

105:15 If you are walking in your anointing- you are protected. 

Stand on His promises. Allow God to work, don't try to figure it out. It's like your on a rollercoaster. If you know every turn and curve and up and down it can take the fun out of it. It's the surprises in roller coasters that make it fun. ;) Get ready people!

Get It Together

I don't feel like I have it all together. And if I am honest with myself, I don't have it all together. I oversleep. I eat too much. I don't exercise. I miss my quiet times. I talk to the Lord more than I listen. I don't stay on my budget. And like last night, I skipped doing my homework. Simply, because I didn't want to do it. 

Why is it that I do this!? I get so frustrated with myself. As I talk to other people, I find out that I am not the only one. But this morning, I apologized to the Lord for it. And He spoke back, "I didn't ask you to have it all together." That's the thing. He didn't. He asked us to love him and serve him. (Amongst other things as well.) He asked us to love him totally and completely. He asked us to live a lifestyle that lines up with the word. He asked us to love him so completely that it becomes a lifestyle. 

He isn't a perfect recipe or formula. Yes, according to the world I should be up at 8am, eating healthy, exercising, etc, etc. But if I do all of that but not love….. what am I!? Nothing. I must love. I must love with my entire being. I must love and serve whole-heartedly. Completely abandoned to His will.

I will not be so ignorant to dismiss my lack of discipline because I love the Lord. I totally believe that the Lord wants us to live a life with some solid disciplines. Look at Proverbs 5:23- "For lack of discipline they will die, led astray by their own great folly. 

Folly: Definition: Noun: Foolishness, stupidity, thoughtlessness

So, as I was praying and asking the Lord for a passion to wake up at 8am, ready to go exercise, and resist Coca-Colas; He reassured me that He has me in His hand. That He loves me like I am. But that yes, I do need to work on some things in my life. One lie that I have told myself, is that one day I would reach perfection. I would "have it all together". And that's not true. Some days, I might. But other days, I might not get it all just right. I don't go into my day with a defeated attitude saying that I'll never be able to do this. I wake up, put on the armor of the Lord, fill myself with His word and truth, and dive into the day confident in what the Lord has called me to. 

He doesn't want us to have it all together, He wants us to be intentional. Intentional about: spending time with Him, serving Him, loving and serving others, taking care of our bodies (adequate sleep, exercise, and eating healthy), and walking in our individual purpose and callings. 

I encourage you with the fact that you aren't the only one who doesn't have it all together. But that it's okay. Just start working on being intentional. And remember that He's holding you. He's got your back. And their is grace for our lives with Him. 

A Short Blog on Love.

     If you have a husband please do not complain to me about him. I don't have any friends that do this. But, I hear so many women complain about their husbands. And it's always his fault. And he doesn't do enough. What if instead of degrading your husband- you encouraged him? I know that I am a merely 20 year old single girl who isn't married or close to being married, but you can learn alot from the outside in. Marriages are the one thing that I study and watch. I love it when I see a couple that is still in love, working on their marriage, and striving to be the best that they can be for one another.
     Divorce rates are skyrocketing. The other day I had a customer say that normal life is: Get married. Have kids. Get divorced. How sad is that!? I am lucky to be surrounded by couples that work at their relationship and constantly choose love.

     And that's the thing..... you have to choose love. You have to work at it. You gotta make time for each other. You have to make each other a priority. And when he drives you nuts.... think about me. A single girl who can't wait to get married.

Jonah.

     Jonah. That's what the Lord said to me tonight. I kind of laughed to myself because everyone knows about Jonah. I was almost cocky in my "spirituality", like I was too good to read Jonah. Doesn't the Lord know how many times I've read Jonah!? But, when the Lord speaks- I've learned to obey. I opened up the Word not expecting to hear from the Lord.
     Total opposite. The Lord spoke some truths to me that definately have changed my perspective on the story of Jonah. The Lord also taught me to get off my "high-horse" and to stay a learner. (Always stay a novice! We can always learn something.) The wonderful thing about the word of the Lord is it is always relevant. It works like building blocks. You can always build foundational truths to your knowledge "wall'. It just keeps building on the previous truth.

     I thought I would share what the Lord taught me this evening. Here is a recap of the story in case you've forgotten. :) The Lord told Jonah to go to Nineveh. Jonah thought he had better things to do.  Jonah bought a ticket and jumped on a ship. An awful storm came about when they were sailing. They casted lots to figure out who was causing it. It was Jonah. (His disobedience.) They casted him over. The sea quit. Jonah got eaten by a whale. Stayed in the whale for 3 days. He spit him up. The Lord told him to go to Nineveh again. He went. He did what he was supposed to do. Nineveh prayed and fasted. The Lord had compassion. Jonah went to the outskirts of the city to watch what would happen. The Lord gave him a shade vine for his comfort. The next day the Lord sent a worm and the vine shirveled. Jonah was angry because of the vine dying. (Sigh.... )

     There are many "Jonahs" walking around in our society. They recognize that Jesus is Lord over their life but are running away from their calling. Some are paying to run away from their calling like Jonah did when he bought the ticket for sea. We must wake up to our callings. We must obey what the Lord has spoken to us. He made and created each of us. Why do we question if He knows best!? I get so frustrated with myself when I question God. And I have to remind myself that I do not know best. He has known me longer than I have known me! He created me! Don't you think He knows what is best for my life!? I should trust him and obey!

     I laughed when I read that Jonah paid to flee from God. Why do we run so quickly from the things God calls us to!? Fear? Rejection? Pride?

     Even the fish obey God. The whale could have eaten Jonah. But the Lord spoke and told it to spit him out.... and the whale obeyed. Amazing.

     After Jonah was spit out God did not give him a new assignment. He gave him the first one. We question why we can't hear God tell us what to do in our lives... when He is waiting for us to obey what He has already spoken! Recover what the Lord has spoken and obey Him.

     The Lord provided Jonah a vine for his comfort. But the next day He sent a worm. When Jonah questioned God... The Lord replied and asked him if he had tended to it to make it flourish. Many times the Lord does not give us things we are praying for because our character can't withstand it. We have to be in a position to receive what we are praying for! If you can't handle the 20 dollars God gives you ever week then how can he trust you with 2,000 dollars a week!? Be faithful with what God gives you. Tend to it. Cultivate it! Make it flourish!

     This last truth is what really got me. I pray for so many amazing things to happen in my life. But I wonder if I'm ready for them!? I need to get to a place where I am prepared and ready for what He gives me so I can continue to hold on to it. I always want the Lord to be able to trust me with what He gives me! I am not saying that this is salvation by works.... No matter how much we do- we aren't saved by our good acts. We are saved through grace. But faith without actions is dead. So the two go hand in hand. I want to be faithful to a faithful God! He is faithful with me, so it should work like every other relationship. And I should return the faithfulness.


Lord, I ask that you speak to each of us! Show us your plan for our lives, give us the boldness to obey no matter what the circumstances are. I ask that if we have forgotten what you have spoken to us that you remind us. Give us the diligence and discipline to build a character that can handle what you want to give us. We are always Yours Lord! We love you. Amen. 

Faithfulness & Perfect Timing

     My heart and mind are full this afternoon. So many thoughts run around in my mind. Thoughts of confusion, thoughts of clarity, thoughts of worry, thoughts of joy..... some things in my life I am so certain about and others I'm praying I've made the right choice. This morning the Lord spoke a promise over me that he's spoken several times over me. "My faithfulness is your shield and rampart." It comes out of Psalm 91:4. At the beginning of the year Pastor Jeff asked the staff to read Psalm 91 every day, I'll admit I've been slacking the past month but this morning I set aside some time and dove into the Word.
     The Lord knows exactly what I need. And Psalm 91:4 was it this morning. His faithfulness is unshakeable. It can't be shaken. Can't be broken. It has no breaking point. He will remain faithful. He has remained faithful. He has done so much for me and you that proves this point. He has never left us. Even when I've run away, when I have turned my back to the whisper of his voice, He was still there. He remained the same.
     A rampart is a defensive wall. The Message translate the verse that His arms are protecting me. It's the truth. I am smashed into the love of my Savior and surrounded by His arms. The arms that hold the universe. I am loved, protected, and watched over.
     I know that no matter what happens in my life, the Lord is my shield and rampart. He will be faithful. Through heartaches, worries of life, times of extreme trust, times of sorrow, and times of joy- He remains faithful. He protects me. He knows what is best for me. Just like a mother knows what is best for their daughter or son, He knows what is best for me. Don't loose hope. Don't loose your trust in Him- He is holding it all together. He withholds nothing good from us!
     One of the things that I love to do is babysit. I get to pretend that I am a mother for just a few hours. I was watching one child once and had heated them up some dinner. Since I am just a pretend mother I didn't microwave it to the perfect temperature. It was a little too hot. So the poor child was forced to stare at me holding their yummy food while it cooled off. I'm sure they were thinking, "Does Bren Bren not think I need the food? I am so hungry. I need that in my life. It will make me full. It will make my tummy stop hurting. Why won't she give me that, it looks so good." But you see, I knew that it was exactly what he needed, but I also knew that if I gave it to him at that moment that it would hurt him. It would burn his tongue. So I waited for it to cool off and then I was able to feed it to him.
     I tell you this for a reason. Don't loose sight of the promises the Lord has given you. He knows the PERFECT timing to give it to you. Yes, it is exactly what you need. Yes, it will propel you into your calling. Yes, it will make your heart skip a beat. Yes, it will be so yummy and awesome. Yes, it will stop your heart from aching. But right now might not be the perfect timing. He has it in His hands. He will release it into your life at the perfect time.

    And until it happens, rest in the fact that his faithfulness is your shield and rampart. Faithfulness. Not going anywhere. It's always there. He is faithful. He will never cheat you. He will never loose sight of His beloved. Rest in that and the worries of the world will drift away. Claim the verse over every worry and step back and watch what the Lord will do.

Parenting 101

     I absolutely can not wait to be a mother. I have said it so many times before and have dreamt of the day. One of the things I do to prepare for motherhood is make a list of the things I want to do with my kids before stressful days of dirty diapers, a 2 page to-do list, a house to clean, and a husband to feed consume my mind. I have a feeling that in that situation I won't think of brilliant parenting ideas.
     Another thing that I seem to notice is horrible parenting. Or parenting that drives me nuts. Or kids that don't know how to behave. So.... I have decided to write a blog on my tips on parenting. Sure, I don't have a kid or a husband. And no, I'm not a scholar on parenting. But- I babysit. I watch. I pretend. I notice things. And I have a blog. So I can write it if I want to. :) Hehe.

Parenting 101

-You may spank your child. It is not abuse. Sometimes it is simply what needs to be done. I can clearly point out children that I know are not "spanked" children. It is not abuse. Sure- you don't beat your child. But a nice spanking is not going to kill. Spare the rod.... not a good idea.

- Allow your children to answer questions. If you are constantly answering questions for them they will never learn to communicate.

-Restaurants: Let your child order their food. This is something that they will have to do for the rest of their life. At the age of 5 if something was wrong with my hamburger my mom told me to go to the counter to get it fixed. I now know how to deal with the public, with restaurants, with managers, and with people. I can answer if I want Coca Cola (duh) or sweet tea. I think your child can as well.

      -If you are worried that they will order the most expensive items- give them a budget. Look at the menu before hand... decide an appropriate price and tell them that they have 8 dollars to spend tonight, tip included. This teaches them to spend within their means and whenever they are 20 they won't cut their server dry on a tip because they can't plan out beforehand.

-Allow them to make decisions. Even if you know they will fail. If they always succeed- what are they going to do when they go to college or get in the real world. Making mistakes is part of life- they must learn to deal with them.

-If your child falls- it will be okay. Allow them to get up themselves without having you hovering over them.

-They can wait for juice if you are in the middle of a conversation. If you meet every want that they have at that instant moment you are raising NOW monsters. And at the age of 16 that isn't going to be pretty.

-Get creative with your discipline. Parent like Jesus parents. Not out of fear. (this comes from a Kris Vallotin teaching) You don't want your kids scared of every thing they do. Allow them to make mistakes but also give them options. Example: "I would like you to set the table, if you choose not to you can sit i your room while the rest of the family eats." This teaches your child to think of how they can prepare in life. If they set the table... then they will have something to eat their food on. And FOLLOW THROUGH. Don't give them food an hour after dinner. (Once again, this isn't abuse. They can miss a meal. It's like fasting. It's biblical.)

-Parent is teamwork. Mom back your husband up. Dad, back your wife up. Even if you don't agree at the moment. If they know that Mom and Dad mean business and Dad won't get them out of trouble then they will be less likely to do "wrong". They also will respect the two parents for having each others backs.

-Take your child on dates. Real ones. Let them get dressed up... clean up the truck... dress up... and treat them nice. Reward them for good grades.

-Teach your child to make "inside out decisions".  To decide to do right because that is what their heart knows to do. Or what the Holy Spirit says.

-Communicate with your children. Let them know your expectations. Encourage them. Love them

-Hug your child. Tell them you love them.

-If you have to buy your child something everytime you go to WalMart.... not a good idea. What are ya gonna do when your in carlots? Think of the future. They need to be behave because it's the right thing/ what mom needs/ etc, etc.

-Read One Minute Mom .... my mother read it.... and wished she had it when we were younger. All 3 children love our mom and dad and respect them incredibly much. We can sit down and have dinner without yelling and without hating it. I look forward to spending time with them.

-Invest in your child without spoiling. It is perfectly okay for your child to pay for their own gas, have a job at 16, and pay for their own college. They will appreciate it. Don't spoil your child. Doesn't matter how much money you have. They will have to know how to manage money in the future and if you bail them out every time....... how will they know? It's okay for them to have overdraft fees..... let them figure out how to fix it.

-Stop arguing with your spouse. You expect your children to get a long and not fight... but you sit and fight with your spouse, say hateful things, don't encourage, and totally disrespect them. Lead by example.

-Find out their love language and feed it. :) http://www.5lovelanguages.com/

-Let them clean their own room. Seriously, why are you cleaning it? That's ridiculous. Same with laundry. These are things they WILL have to do on their own.

-Give them a bedtime so you can have time with your spouse.

-Date night. This teaches your child that he/she will be okay without mommy or daddy all of the time. And shows the importance of your spouse in your life.

-There are times to be a parent and times to be a friend. Most of the time.... you need to be a parent. They have friends at school.

-Order of priorities: 1. God 2. Spouse 3. Children
My mother will still choose spending time with my dad over me. She still makes time for me but I know that if they have date night- they are going, alone. This does not hurt my feelings. This makes me feel secure because I know my parents will not get a divorce. Your child is petrified of you divorcing your husband or wife. Don't do it. Not fair to children. You took a vow... find your passion with your spouse and make it work. Love is a choice.

-Don't yell at your spouse. This teaches that yelling is an appropriate form of communication.

-LOVE. LOVE. LOVE. Lead in love. Serve with your child. And by golly- get em in church. :)


Yay! If you made it to the end of the list. I congratulate you. I wish I could apologize if I offended you... but I won't. Because sometimes the truth is what we need to hear. We aren't perfect. I guarantee I'm going to need to re-read my own blog once I have my own precious children. And if you're offended.... it might mean because you need to tweak some ideas on parenting. I love you. I love your kids. I can't wait for me to read a young woman's blog on parenting who doesn't have kids some day. It shall be a taste of my own medicine. And medicine it is..... might actually. help me out.

Insignificant Purpose.

I am to a point in my life where I'm ready for things to be worth it. I'm so tired of pointless homework, meetings, relationships, etc. Everything that I do- I want to have purpose. I write this as I sit in Panera Bread procrastinating homework. I know that the way I handle my homework will correlate into how I handle other responsibilities in my life. However, I am still ready for them to have purpose! Most of my homework assignments have purpose... the specific one I'm not doing right now... does not.
     I'm not 100% positive on how to get to the place where things are significant. And I should probably smack my hand and correct my thoughts.... because what I do today does have purpose. The way I handle the seemingly "insignificant" things in my life right now- builds discipline and character for the things I will handle in the future. Press on brothers and sisters. For there will be a rainy day when I'm watching my kids and being the wife that I am called to be when I'll look back and be thankful that I was obedient today for the things God is calling me into.
     How you handle today will be a building block on how you handle tomorrow. Deal with today's problems with diligence.... Prepare yourself today for the things you'll face tomorrow.

     And the life I dream of will come.... the life that only the Lord could bless me with.... is in the making. It's in the building process. The foundation is being laid..... I'd never want a house without a foundation just like I'd never want a family, husband, relationships, job, and other things the Lord will bring into my life wihtout a strong enough foundation (character, determination, will-power, wisdom, etc) to support it.

Build a foundation today..... even with the things that seem so meaningless and insignificant.

Learning. Receiving. Ministry.

I just posted a status on facebook and decided that I had more to say on the subject. I get so frustrated with people that can not receive from others. This is probably because I struggle with receiving from others, but with that being said, I'm working on it. My goal in every church I walk in to, every time I spend time with someone, is to learn something from them. I want to be able to be ministered to just as much as I minister to others. We all need time to connect with God. We must spend time in intimacy with the Lord. Intimacy produces fruit. And anything healthy grows. We must spend time with the Lord and with others to be healthy.
     Many times whenever we are super involved in ministry we get so involved in the doing. The to-do lists, what isn't going right, what needs to be fixed, what we need to work on- that we totally view the church as a workplace. Subconciously we come in the doors ignoring the fact that we are stepping on holy ground, that we are entering into the house of the Lord.
     If you are a worship leader- can you go to a church service and worship under someone else's leadership? Same as a pastor? Any ministry that you are in... can you be under someone else's leadership? Are you always the teacher on the subject or do you learn from others? Are you the only one you can hear from? Of course, we test everything Biblically. But allow yourself to sit in the presence of the Lord.
     Have we also become so overwhelmed with ourselves that we aren't even listening to the Lord's input on our ministries? Do we seek His face for where we are in leadership? Or can we get past our great ideas, strategic planning, and overthinked strategies? We must always be able to learn from the Lord. To receive correction from our Savior. Just like a parent- Our Papa God will always encourage us, but there is also a time for correction in our walk with the Lord. And..... it is okay! It's totally fine to be corrected by our Savior. And if you obey him  and change- that shows that you are able to hear God on not only the great things but also on the things that are difficult to change.

So how do we get to this place? Where we can be ministered to just as much, if not more, as we minister to others. Practically..... You can develop a group of close friends that can speak into your life, and not ones that are scared of offending you. But friends that will be a friend and speak truth into your life. And when you step into the house of the Lord don't forget that you are on holy ground. Love on Jesus and allow Jesus to love on you. Make a list of things you are working on. One of the top things that is on my list is this: Learn from everyone. Love while learning. Love learning.
    

A Preview of My Book...

As I write these very words I think about my husband. It’s pretty often that the subject of love and relationships are brought up in my everyday life. I work with the public and many of them ask about my purity ring when I hand them their change. Or they want to know a little about my life and ask if I have a boyfriend. And for some reason I get nervous. I suppose it’s because I think that they won’t think I am “cool” because I’ve really never had a real boyfriend. Granted, I’ve had a few guys I’ve hung out with and spent (too much) time with, but never have I been asked,  “Will you be my girlfriend?”. So when I am asked about this subject I almost cower.  The other day I found myself doing that very thing, when I checked myself. Turned my attitude around and proudly said, “I’m waiting for my husband.”

            There is no shame in your purity.  9.5 times out of 10 after I tell someone that I have never had sex or came close to having sex they react with a great deal of respect. Shock is also normally involved in their response, and some people think I am lying. I urge you, to never, ever, do what I have done; cowering or thinking that you aren’t cool because you are waiting for your husband. You are so beyond awesome for waiting for your future spouse. And if you have messed up, no worries- there is so much grace for you. God loves you and is still proud of you. Stand up, dust yourself off, and stay pure. J

            Growing up I always wondered if something was wrong with me. I was the twin that never had the boyfriend. I would be Chelsea’s third wheel so she could hang out with her boyfriend. I would painfully stare out the window longing to be loved. I wondered if I wasn’t pretty enough, funny enough, perfect enough for someone to care about me, to love me, and to think I was awesome. I so deeply wanted someone to text me in the morning and to tell me Good Morning. And I was always so scared that I wasn’t good enough. Today I am so thankful that I was being hidden during those years (and I suppose still am being hidden). I firmly believe that the Lord was hiding me in His arms because He knew my destiny. He knew that one day I would be writing this page to a girl or boy sitting at home wondering if something is wrong with them.

            Not only did He know that part of my destiny, but He knew how proud I would be one day telling my husband that I have everything to give him. It’s all his, and I have saved it for him. He knew that my wilderness, singleness experience would make me appreciate, love, and cultivate a marriage one day. Even now, while I am in that same stage- I know that one day I will be so excited that I have a husband. And 10 years into the marriage- I’ll re-read this book and think, “I am so lucky to be married, there is someone out there that is pleading with God for this opportunity.”     

            Singleness is not a curse. It’s not always fun, but it is not the worse thing in the world. It can be very rewarding if you don’t mope around about it. Choose to have fun in life even when you are single. Don’t worry about being this perfect person so you can catch someone’s eye. Because if you get married, 15 years later- they will know you aren’t perfect. J

Modesty 102

I kind of can't believe I did this... but here is Modesty 102 with Brennen Gaddis. :)

 Believe it or not, I decided to show some examples of my most recent modest and "fashionable" outfits. Being yesterdays and todays. (I never dreamt of claiming myself to be fashionable on a blog that is available for anyone to read.) My intent is not to toot my own horn or to tell you to dress like me. My goal is to inspire you to dress in a modest way that will cause people to look at YOU and not your skin. That's the goal right? In life, I want people to know who I am. How great it would be to be known as the most fashionable, prettiest, and Godliest girl... but when it REALLY all comes down to it... I just want people to know me. Brennen Gaddis. The real me. The girl who laughs at inappropriate things and likes to drink Coca-Cola Classic wayyy too much. So with that being said, don't distract who you are on the inside by what you wear on the outside. Show people the real you and dress with class. Be cute, be funky, be beautiful, but most importantly be you. The you with class and integrity.

 Okay, so here we go with Modesty 102!!  I have gotten an abundance of feedback from my first post on Modsety.... and it spurred my imagination on. Here are practical tips of how I dress myself. These first 2 images are the same day- in one I simply added a scarf. Scarfs are always a nice & modest touch to outfits, they also help cover up a good amount of skin while being fashionable. This one is a light scarf since it was pretty warm yesterday. (Well, in the beginning of the day.)

     Even though I wore a scarf I went a head and layered my oversized black scoop neck t-shirt (Walmart, $5) with a pink camisole. It's a higher rise tank and it also is pretty long. Which is great since I have to bend over at work. I was glad that I went ahead and wore this tank top under my shirt because half way through the day I dropped part of my Italian Chicken sandwich on my scarf. :) This would be an outift that I would be comfortable wearing heels with. Be picky... it's a war out there for the men we pass on the streets. 

Layers make life easy... and make modesty easy. Layer, layer, layer. Invest in camisoles. The camisoles that I am wearing in both pictures were under $4. One I bought in Panama so I have no idea what brand it is, and the tan one I bought at Charolette Russe! Forever 21 also has cheaper camis.
Skin tight clothes are not modest. They show every curve of your body and leave men practically undressing you.

Hide your bra straps! This can be a tough one... and sometimes I fail at this... but there is no need for every man you pass to know what color bra you're wearing.

I asked a few guys that go to church with me their thoughts on what women wear. Might I add that these are attractive men of God... I didn't ask geeky guys. ;) These are guys that you'd be extremely blessed to bring home to momma. They are some dearly close friends of mine and have hearts of gold. One agreed that clothes have an affect and added how important it is to not be too revealing.... but the main thing that attracted him to girls is their relationship with the Lord, their laugh, and how their looks. Another one said, "You are worth the pursuit of a man, no one is worth the back burner. And relationships based on competition are not healthy. Don't dress for the world, dress for you, be comfortable with yourself. It's not worth dressing for the world." He also added to not show anything you cover up in front of your parents to any man that isn't your husband. Haha. ;) Another guy added that girls / women who dress inappropriately scandalous look ridiculous. Dress in harmoney with yourself and not try to force anything, style and attractiveness are more an outward symbol of knowing who you are than a physical lure.

     When it all comes down to it, modesty is worth it. Your husband will thank you for it. You don't have to show extra skin to get a man. It's possible to do it. You're saving every man you pass each day the battle that lies within them. Protect yourself and protect them. ;) Be encouraged.

Put Some Clothes On

     The other day I was in a dressing room with 6 dresses. I tried each of them on.... in the appropriate size.... and none of them worked. Why? Because if I bent over the whole world would know what color panties I'd have on. Granted.... if I stood up and did the fingertip rule I would [barely/hardly] pass. But when life would hit me in that dress and I would one day chase a plastic bag in Walmart's parking lot..... or lean down to tie my shoe (Laced shoes and dresses are in style) more of Brennen would be revealed than what is necessary or appropriate.
     The fact of the matter is.... modesty is a difficult way to dress these days. It's almost easiest to cave in wear my dresses a little bit shorter... and my shirts a little bit lower. I mean, what's a little extra skin showing gonna hurt? Let me tell ya...... It's gonna become a battle for a man of God. So beautiful ladies..... take a stand... and put on some dang clothes.
    
     A few years ago... I didn't care what in the world I wore. I'd run out of the house as quick as I could because I knew my momma wouldn't approve.... but I wanted to be "hot". But somehow, the Lord has placed a passion for modesty, purity, and holiness upon my heart. And I've been silent for far too long. I'm here to say... or write.... Even in 2011 you can dress modestly.
     For what it's worth, I thought I'd share a few tips. :)

Modest is Hottest Gorgeous, Beautiful, and Stunning Class 101:
1. Praise Test in every outfit.
     First.... Lift your hands.... and come on now... lift 'em high. He's worthy right!?    
     Second.... Kneel... do every type of kneeling.... Is yo' booty hangin out? How's your shirt.... can you see straight down it!? Watch out!
     Third... Jump a few times... just in case life hits ya today. Does it swoosh and show too much of ya'self?

2. Layer. Invest in a few camisoles that come up pretty high. No cleavage. Cleavage is simply not fair to any man. Men are visual and as Godly as they can be.... you don't want your cleavage to be their stumbling block. You also want camisoles that are longer. So if your shirt comes up your back, side, or belly doesn't show.

3. Dresses.... pick wisely. Don't buy a dress that's too short. It may be the cutest dress there is.... but it's not worth it. You can always add leggings if it's appropriate.

4. Balance. I am not suggesting that you wear a ugly/ out dated clothes, no make up, and the only thing you can see if your face. You can still be absolutely gorgeous without showing tons of skin. If you're shirt scoops down and shows some skin up top (a Godly amount) then pair it with something that covers you up on the bottom. And vis versa... many times if I wear a skirt- I will choose a t-shirt style blouse or a shirt layered with a jacket. It simply balances you out.... and shows that you can tastefully look beautiful.

5. High Heels. Heels can be hott, but they can also be pretty skanky. If you're wearing a skirt that comes a few inches above your knee.... I'm not so sure heels are going to be the best choice. I would wisely choose a pair of flats or cute gladiator sandals. If you're wearing jeans, or a longer skirt.... go for the heels. You can rock a great pair of shoes modestly.

6. Accessorize. I'm not so sure that this is a Modesty tip... but it is a fashion tip. Many times the only modest things I can find are plain items... but it's totally okay if you accessorize yourself. Change it up with your color.... I always try to throw in a surprise accessory that most people wouldn't think would go with it. :) It's like a game!

7. Be you. From head to toe. Don't try to impress men with your skin. Think if what you're wearing is what attracts a man to you... dress for a man that you deserve. If he is only attracted to you for your mini-skirt, cleavage, and long legs.... I'm not so sure he's the Godly man that you desire and deserve.



Men- I apologize for what you go through every day. I can't imagine the inner battle you go through with the way that we dress. I vow to always keep your inner man in mind when I dress. Always making sure that I am dressed modestly and appropriately.

Girls.... be you. That's the best advice I have for you when it comes to life. Be the best you that God created you to be. Dress modestly and wear a smile and some confidence. ;)

Blogging.... about Blogging. Nitty Gritty Truth.

     As a blogger I sometimes want to just throw my problems out into the world because writing is an escape for me. I want to vent and yell and cry all through my blog with the frustrations of life. I have decided against it. And will continue to. Not because it wouldn't be fun and feel good, but because 1. it's not tasteful, 2. it won't help, and 3. it drives me nuts when other people live their life through social media. So I refuse. But a bad habit that I have developed is not writing what is in my heart- simply because it might step on some toes. What I know as truth, and as black and white, has yet been revealed to some of those around me. (Or they have yet to listen.) I openly admit that I am sure there are some out there that think the same thing about me. And, the best part about it..... it's okay. We're human. We make mistakes. We couldn't be better people if we were already perfect. We have to simply brush ourselves off and get up and try again!
     So, I, Brennen Gaddis, promise to never withhold Godly wisdom or advice because I'm afraid it might step on one's toes. I also promise to not hold back from writing something I'm not an expert on. I have something to offer. Just like every single one of you.

     So be prepared.... my blogs might get a little bit more honest. I might even turn into one of those bloggers that you say, "Did she really write that!?" But... the truth must be revealed. I am a messenger. And a messenger that is learning right along with you. :)

     Modesty, Dating, Marriage, Parenting (I said I wouldn't hold back from writing about something I'm not an expert at.... I forgot to add- not experienced on there as well.) I'm excited to get parts of my heart out there. Even if just one person reads it and is touched.... I have done my part. It excites me to write even this blog. I never imagined I'd write a blog... about writing a blog. :) So fun.

     Hold onto your skinny jeans and grab a Coca-Cola. ;)

The Journey.

     The other night I was so blessed to watch a few couples be prayed and prophesied over. As I watched one particular couple hold hands, lean on each other, and receive the Lord's word over their life together- tears came to my eyes. Tears of happiness and rejoicing for the most part. But in that quiet part of my heart, I ached for that very scene in my own life. It's what I pray and dream of, it's what I write about, it's what I love. Love. Marriage. 2 individuals living life as one. Selflessness. A Holy Matrimony.
     In that moment, my mind raced back and I could see myself laying in bed on lonely nights and praying for my husband. I saw moments when [it seemed] everyone else had someone to love and I had no one. The moments where I had been overlooked for the superficial girl that wasn't even the real deal. And my heart ached... it ached for that bond I will one day have with my husband. I simply cried out to the Lord that I wanted that but only in His timing. In my little mind, the perfect time for me to meet my husband is in the next 5 minutes, (giving myself time to get myself together).
     But ultimately, The Lord knows the perfect timing. I may not understand it, I'm sure you all could come up with plenty of reasons for me to not get married. Probably the fact that I'm 20 being #1. But I know that He has it all under control. (And 20's a perfect age..... lots 'o babies or lots o' time before having babies!) He's writing a beautiful story for me. One that I will cherrish for years to come. And a story that is a reality. One day I will have a husband to "do life together". To have a family with and to serve Jesus together.
     The whole point of this blog post isn't to share with you my heart for the man God has for me but it is this: The time spent in waiting will only deepen the amount of gratitude I will one day have for what God has given me. Life is not about the end result. It's about everything in between. It's about the journey. And this journey that I am on of preparing myself for my man is beautiful. I'm not always perfect and I will ALWAYS be growing. And I am okay with that. The thing to remember is that waiting may not be fun, but it's worth it. Every moment of waiting is worth it if you're waiting for what God has for you.

     Be encouraged. Love your season of waiting. I don't love it yet.... but I'm at least beginning to like it. ;)

What is Sizing You Up?

     This (crazy) woman has a pet boa constrictor. A snake that she absolutely loves. Loves so much that it sleeps with her at night. She noticed that he hadn't been eating for a while and that when he was sleeping he was sleeping in a straight line, when he normally slept curled up in ball. She decided to call her vet and ask him about it. As she tells him all of this he immediately says to get rid of the snake as soon as possible. Come to find out..... The snake had been fasting so he could save enough space to eat his owner. He had been sleeping straight up and down because he was sizing up his owner. And when he reached a certain length then he knew that he had enough space to eat her.
     Pretty dang gross right? I absolutely hate snakes, so I really hate this story. I thought about doing some research to find out more about this "sizing up" thing that they do, but refrained because I knew I'd have nightmares, and constantly be on the snake look out! However, I couldn't get this story out of my mind for quite a while. Because it floors me that the woman would sleep with a snake. That is ridiculous. As I began to think on this it hit me that we do the same things.
     We allow things in our life that can potentially harm or kill us. Addictions, ungodly relationships, ungodly habits and behaviors, etc. We know that it isn't what God intended for us- but we go ahead and let it sleep with us, size us up, and give it the opportunity to eat us alive. And that is exactly what sin will do. satan will use every opportunity that we give him to get into our lives. He can manipulate it to where in the beginning "it's not a big deal". The sin is so small that why would it even matter? (Sin always matters, that's a lie. It's from satan so don't listen to that!) But as time passes we get more comfortable with that sin in our life... and it grows... and before you know it, it's just like that boa constrictor. Waiting for the moment to take our life away. Sin is crouching at our door, and we must rule over it (Genesis 4:7).
     So, what do we do with this massive, life-sucking, killing, monster of a sin!?
1. We cut it off. Get rid of it. Give yourself no access to it. This is not a time to show yourself that you can be strong and just say no. No, do not even give yourself the opportunity to get into that area of sin again.
2. Get an accountability partner. It is too easy to go back to the things we are comfortable with. Having someone that will hold you accountable to your decision to go God's way over your own will be extremely helpful.
3. Replace it with something Godly. Find something that you can do for God.
4. Pray against that struggle. It is from satan- therefor it doesn't stand a chance. Rebuke it and replace it with the truth. For example, if you have trouble with body image- rebuke the lie that you aren't pretty. And replace it with "the King is enthralled by my beauty" (Psalm 45:11).
5. Dust yourself off and keep moving. Your past does not define you. You still have an opportunity to be the best you that God created. It's never too late.



     Take a look at your life and ask yourself the question, "What is sizing me up?" or "What am I trapped inside from allowing myself to "sleep" with ungodly harmful things?


I end this post with a quote from Kris Vallotin, "You have not been put on earth for the devil to tormet you, you have been put on this earth to torment the devil."



  

Blog Business!

My wonderful and faithful blog readers,

     Have I told you how much I love you? And how much I appreciate that you take time out of your day to read my thoughts? Because I do. It means the world to me. Which is why I trust you with some advice I need. 

     One of my dreams is to write. I've had this passion and desire since I was younger but have always watered it down. I remember writing short stories as a child and the teacher always telling me that I had too much in it for a short story. So I quit writing. Well- I'm writing again- and it makes me come alive. I absolutely love it. I love that people understand what I'm saying. I love that I'm able to put into words what is in my heart. So I want to make my dreams come true. 

     I'm beginning to work on a book about purity. But I also have been encouraged and have been thinking about pursuing writing for a newspaper or a magazine of some sort. I am definitely not the best writer around but I refuse to believe the lie that I have nothing to offer. Because, I do. Just like YOU have something to offer.

     I need some help picking out some blogs to edit and send in to a few places. So- let me know what your favorite blog posts are! Also- what would you all like to see me write about? Is there anything that you would like to request me to do/write/ showcase? I am always open to ideas and need your help in being the best writer that I can be. 

     Also- if you know of a magazine or somewhere that my writing would fit in that I could send in a blog let me know of that to! 

There you go lovely people of God! Time to help a girl out achieve her dreams! :) And that girl- just happens to be me! :) I love you all!

You can post your suggestions as a comment or e-mail me at brennen_gaddis@yahoo.com, or facebook me a message!  Here's the link to my facebook: http://www.facebook.com/brennengaddis

smile. :)

Life Lessons with Brennen:
a.k.a.-- a post to quiet my mind.... so much going on in it right now :)

• be who you are. pretending or "watering down" yourself does nothing positive
• be the best you while doing this, don't make excuses for ungodly behavior by saying "this is how I am", be Godly and be who God's called you to be. 
• love people limitlessly. give them grace. if you are wrong in being frustrated/angry- make it right. 
• show and demonstrate mercy. 
• cute clothes really do make a difference in your day
• stay thankful for the things in your life
• win. win. situations- in every aspect of your life
• try new things. try things you aren't good at. it's always fun learning about it.
• find the unique things about people and help bring it out of them. encourage uniqueness.
• smile. there is nothing better than the feeling of a true and genuine smile on your face.
• have fun in life. there's a time and place for everything. immaturity can be allowed sometimes ;)
• take time to invest in people's lives. get to know them. 
• talk less than other people. (I need this written so I see it all the time)
• live out your passions. if you find something that makes you come alive- don't abandon it. 
• love yourself and who God is molding you into

God is so beyond amazing. I am so glad that hope and peace are a part of my day. I am so thankful for what God is doing and am beyond excited for the things to come. 

I love Jesus. Yes, I do. I love Jesus. How about you?

Not Noticed.

     I have this new obsession. And it truly is an obsession. One Tree Hill. It's a tv show that has been airing for quite some time. I am not very good at watching shows every week and planning my schedule around it. (I think it's a good thing.) However, my friend has loaned me the entire seasons. So that makes it easy to escape and spend hours watching this show. At the point of the show I am in, they are in high school. And boy, does it make me want to go back to high school.
     That's a big statement for me to say. But really, if I could, I 'd go back at least for a week. And I would eat lunch with the ones who have been left out. I would walk down the hallway with the young man who always gets made fun of, and I'd get to know the slightly awkward girl who never speaks. I would make a difference. 
     When I was in high school, I was wrapped up in how much I hated it that I didn't even look to see what I could do to make it better for someone else. There are students and people that go to school and work who despise their lives. Who go unnoticed. Who miss school for weeks and no one ever notices. They live with pain and depression. And why didn't I do anything about it!? Why don't I do something about it? 
     I don't have to be in high school to change someone's life. There are still lonely people. I want to find them. And I want to love them. Why? Because that's what life is about. Life isn't about the coolest new trend, or having the coolest things..... Life is about making a difference. It's about sharing Jesus' love. 
     I hate to admit it, but I'm not sharing His love these days. I'm in my safe "clique" of Christian friends, I've lost my heart for the lost, broken, and down-hearted. But through a television show, the Lord has opened my eyes to them once again. I sat on my couch and cried for them yesterday in shame. Because my heart had never heart for them like that in way too long. My heart is in process of being broken. Broken for the things it should be broken for. And for that, I am not ashamed. 
     Life isn't about me, life is about Jesus and the hurting. Make a difference. Begin today. 

Isaiah 58 says it best,  ⁶ “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: 

to loose the chains of injustice 

   and untie the cords of the yoke, 

to set the oppressed free 

   and break every yoke? 

⁷ Is it not to share your food with the hungry 

   and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter— 

when you see the naked, to clothe them, 

   and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? 

⁸ Then your light will break forth like the dawn, 

   and your healing will quickly appear; 

then your righteousness^[a] will go before you, 

   and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard. 

⁹ Then you will call, and the LORD will answer; 

   you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.