Strong and Courageous.

     A few days ago I read my short devotional out of Hannah Whitall Smith's, Daily Secrets of the Christian Life, book. It was on Joshua 6 and the shout of faith that brought the walls down. Which I will write about soon. So I decided that I wanted to know what God was speaking to Joshua about before the walls of Jericho fell. I set on an adventure in the book of Joshua. There is so much to share from this book. I am amazed at the things God is teaching me from it, and I haven't gotten past chapter 6! Here's what I'm learning.

     

     Moses, a servant of the Lord, dies. Joshua is the son of Nun- who was Moses' aide. God begins to speak to Joshua and tell him these promises of what is to come:

1. You will cross the Jordan River.

2. I am going to give you (the Israelites) the land you cross into. 

3. I will give you every place you set foot.

4.Your territory will be great.

5. No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life.

6. I will be with you always.

7. You (Joshua) will lead these people to the land I have swore to their forefathers.

     Let's put ourselves in Joshua's shoes. God just revealed this to him. I can only imagine myself being in my prayer time and the Lord telling me that I will lead an entire people group to a land that He had sworn to their forefathers. Or that I was going to take Moses' place!? What kind of craziness is that? That just kind of blows my mind. I can hear my thoughts right now- "Where in the world did I come up with that? I am so crazy. Satan, are you tempting me? Jesus- surely you didn't just promise me that!? I can't do that.... so God you didn't tell me that. (LIE)" I mean- lets get real- these promises are going to carry some crazy responsibility. In an instant Joshua's life and future was changed. Pretty awesome and scary if you ask me. 

     So what happens next? I think that the Lord is so smart on the next few things that he speaks over Joshua. He immediately began to encourage Joshua to be strong and courageous. To not be terrified. (Instant reaction to those kind of promises.) So basically, Joshua gets a pep talk before the big game from the Lord. God works in great ways and will prepare you for them. (Truth) 

     And then....... Joshua obeys. Obedience is so key to our relationship with the Lord. We will never receive the things God has for us if we don't obey.... immediately. The big and the little things. To be faithful with the BIG things; we have to be faithful with the little things. So Joshua obeys and takes on the responsibility of being a leader to an abundance of people. Which will require the people to obey Joshua. See the scariness of God's promises to Joshua? They require faith. 110% faith. 

     So Joshua begins to lead his people. He teaches them. He listens to the Lord and shares what the Lord is telling him. He prepares and commands his people that God has blessed him with. And comes steps closer to walking into his calling, the promises over his life, and his destiny. Joshua was born to be a leader. He was formed and created to lead people. What is your calling? What are the things that God has promised over your life? Things that have been prophesied to you? Do we sit back patiently and wait for them to come? Or do we step out on faith and walk into them? I think we will learn from Joshua. 

     But for this post- Here are the things I learned from Chapter 1 in Joshua. God has promises and plans for my life. He will equip me when the time comes. It takes faith and obedience. I just have to be ready to take the step. 

Stinky Cheese

     I am about to share one of my flaws with you all. So I'm trusting that you will still be my friend after you read this. If you think your view of me might change- then visit another blog. :) One of the things I have struggled with since I was in elementary school was cleaning out my lunch box. I'd leave sandwiches, empty jello containers, spoons with peanut butter on them, a banana peel, you name it- I'm sure I left it in there at sometime or another for a good while. The worst was when I'd take tomato soup- inevitably I'd always leave it in there for a week or so. I'm sure your stomachs are churning at this thought... espically if you are Robin Gaddis- the wonderful lady who gave birth to me and is my mother. Because- not always- but most times- she was the one that cleaned out the moldy, smelly nastiness. Forgive me, momma!
     My old habit has struck again. As I am sitting and typing this blog right now there is a cute pink lunchbox sitting on the stairs right now. And it is holding one of my new favorites foods! Brie cheese and a block of sharp cheddar cheese. This would not be bad if it was ready for me to go to work this afternoon- nope, it's not. It has actually been sitting there for probably a week. I know, I know- nasty. And I'm still dreading going in there and opening it up. I'm sure my stomach is going to turn when I open it. But today is the day. I will conquer the pink lunchbox and stinky cheese.
     So I was thinking about this situation this morning, (of course only thinking- not acting upon it), and the Holy Spirit quickened me and whispered a truth inside of me. He said- do you have some stinky cheese in you that you're avoiding because you know that it isn't going to be the prettiest? Do you have some sin, a situation, a relationship, a wounded heart that you aren't willing to open up and clean up the mess inside? I do this often. I know that there is something that I have got to get settled with the Lord but I keep ignoring it- and the longer I ignore it the worst it gets. You know if I would have came home the day I packed that lunch and put the cheese back in the refrigerator and cleaned out everything else in my lunch box it would have never gotten moldy or smelly. The same way with things I deal internally with. If I would go straight to the Lord and admit that I am struggling then it would never have time to get smelly and nasty. But weeks, months, years pass and we ignore the things that are dragging us down. We think about them from time to time and just pass on that we'll get to them another time.
     So what is it in our lives that we're ignoring? That we're not letting the Savior clean out? Something that is just sitting in our lunchbox? Do you think it's time to clean it out?

     He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” Revelation 21:5


     He came to make all things new- He came to renew you- to give you joy and peace. Time to clean it out the wounds. Yes, it may stink. Yes, it may have grown to something you never thought it'd grow into- but better to stop it now then let it get even bigger. 


     What's your stinky cheese? What's your advice? 


Yes mom, I'm going to clean it out now. 


<3, B

The Heartbeat of Yahweh.

Jesus, what is Your heartbeat? What makes it beat faster? What breaks your heart? What makes your heart sing? These are questions that run through my head. And today has been one of those days. I want to know what makes my Father's heart beat. I want to be about my Father's business. 

     Today, as I was thinking back on this question and my past with it, I remembered an encounter I had with my Savior a couple of months ago. It was during a worship service and I hit the floor. Holy Spirit welled up inside of me and told me to get on my face. So there I was.... face down on the floor... at first I began to laugh- because I was on the floor and then I began to weep. This thought of being about my Father's business consumed me. I knew I had been maintaining for a while. I knew that I wasn't really giving the Lord every ounce of who I am. So ten, twenty, I don't really know how long passed during that worship service. And I finally asked the Lord, "What makes your heart beat?" 

     At that moment- the drums began to beat, I could hear people jumping, dancing, and singing to the Lord. My ear against the floor and the movement of people in worship vibrated the floor. And the Lord replied, "This, my Daughter, is my heartbeat. Worshippers arising, Warriors uniting, and my Holy Spirit moving in each one of You." 

     So now I am to the part of how do I make his heartbeat my own? I want His desires to become mine. Not my desires becoming His. I want His word planted in me deep. I want to be unshakeable. I want the Heartbeat of my Yahweh to run deep into my veins and vessels and every little ounce of area that there is. And I want to be about my Father's business. 

     So worshippers arise. The time has come. Warriors unite and prepare. And Followers- be about your Father's business. Let's make his heartbeat a little faster today. 

Remember. Grow. Expect. Gratitude.

     To start things off.... I just want to thank the Lord God Almighty for how extremely blessed I am. I am so thankful for the things that have happened to me, the things that are in my life and the things that are yet to come. Which leads me to my whole purpose for writing this blog. Remembering who you were, growing who you are, expecting what is a head and always being thankful. 

     Remembering back on my life is pretty overwhelming. I am so blessed to have had a relatively normal life. Nothing horribly tragic has happened to me. I have a family who loves and supports me. But looking back on where I was in my walk with God at age 7 when I accepted him into my life. At age 13 where I began to understand the importance of a quiet time. At age 15 when I felt the call to overseas missions. At age 16 on my independent streak where I ignored God. At age 17 when my life was thrown for a whirwind moving away and then moving back home. At age 18 deciding to pursue missions and put college on the back burner. Turning 19 in Panama in Central America at a place of brokenness and surrender to the Lord. And now almost being 20 serving and learning about an amazing God, and a powerful Holy Spirit. That's a blast from the past over my almost 20 years of living. 

     Last night I was looking back on the last 4 months. I have learned, grown, and am still growing so much.  And still have so much to learn. But I am so thankful for where I was 4 months ago and also thankful for where I am now. Learning how God speaks to me has been the most amazing and challenging time of my life... and He still continues to surprise me. 

     Growing is not always an easy part of our lives but is extremely essential. It requires a surrender attitude. It is hard to grow in your walk with God without sacrifice of some sort. Not the crazy hurt myself for salvation kind of thing. But a sacrifice of self... taking on a servant attitude. Going low to go high. I love how Pastor Jeff Phillips says, "Kingdom is a kingdom of opposites. To get you have to give. To go high you must go low." So in an aspect to grow you must shrink. You must surrender yourself completely to the will of the Father. It must turn into Thy will not my will. This is something I struggle with. Daily I have to remind myself that it is not me.... it is Christ who lives in me. I am Christ's mouth, his body. I am responsible for loving others more than myself. It is a wonderful lifestyle to live and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I never miss a penny I give. And I never miss an ounce of myself that I surrender to the Lord. And the great thing about it is that He [God] is much more capable of handling my life than I am. His purpose and his ways are much higher than mine. And in that I take comfort and delight.  So in this moment Lord- I give You who I am. Take it, it is Yours. Use me where you desire. Give me Holy Spirit eyes and open my eyes to the things that break Your heart. Give me a Jesus boldness to do greater things. 

     I am so excited for the things that are ahead. I feel the Holy Spirit releasing some exciting things for the Church in a whole and for myself. I feel like this next season is going to be a season of fruitfulness. I believe that God is going to reveal himself in ways that we aren't used to, it's going to take us changing our outlook on our walk with the Lord and being open to new ways of the Holy Spirit moving. I am excited for a move of God in Owensboro, Kentucky. And I believe that revival is coming. I have been praying and seeking God on our little, cute, and homey city and he has told me that it is coming. Praise the Lord! I am so excited to see where God is going to take my life. I am expectant of a wonderful husband who will encourage and push my walk with the Lord. Someone I can serve alongside. I am so excited to see what mission fields I will step on. To see what lives will impact me. To see little orphans being fed. (www.mercy29.org). To see Promiseland Metro Church grow by multiplication. To see the churches unite in Owensboro, Ky. And then state wide, and then nation- wide... and then reaching out to  the globe. I have so many desires and dreams and visions of what is to come. And just to think- that it's going to better than anything that I can envision! 

     I am so thankful for everything that the Lord has revealed to me. For my family. Promiseland Metro. Church family. Friends. Work. Love. Laughter. Joy. Peace. Freedom. Releasing of His Spirit. Movement of God. Choosing and calling me. Countries. Nations. Glory to God. I am sooooo thankful for all of this. 

What parts of your life do you remember?

What part of you needs to grow and develop?

What do you expect?

What are you thankful for? 

I'd love to hear about your story and what God has saved you from. And the things that He is leading you into. 

The In Between

My prayer for the last year has been, "Lord what next? Send me! What's your desire for me!? Anything to make your heart beat a little faster and to glorify Your kingdom." And honestly, this is still the prayer I pray. I recently decided that I am an In Between. I am not really stuck, but I am not totally "there". You know, "there", the place that you know you are destined, called, or appointed to be at by God. I know confidently that I am to wait. That is what the Lord has been speaking to me. I know that I am moving in the right direction. That I am taking the steps that are necessary, I'm just not totally there. I'm in a transition season. In a time where everything doesn't necessarily make [logical] sense.
     But here is what I do know....
-I am called to love. Love everyone. Love life.
-I am called to mother. Mother nations.
-I am called to heal hearts and bodies through the power of Jesus Christ.
-I am called to smile and laugh and enjoy life.
-I am called to minister in the small ways.
-I am called to overseas missions throughout my entire life. (India is in the works now for this fall.... join in prayer for finances and more wisdom on this short-term trip and any other that the Lord may have for me.)
-I am called to rest and let God take it.
- I am called to so much more that God is still revealing.
-I am called to want more but still be content with what God has placed on my plate.

I have to remind myself of these things.... or else I get caught up in what everyone else is doing. I have to remind myself that I am still worth something even though I am not in college... Jesus is who matters. And following in what he speaks to my heart. So Lord, it's in Your hands. I am clay. You are the potter. Mold and make me.


I think I'll rejoice in this season of In Betweeness.