One of the things that I find myself talking about constantly is people's passions. What makes them come alive. What they love to do. One of the things we believe and teach at my church is to use the God given passions for his glory and also for an income. For the past month I have been searching my brain for what makes me come alive. And to be honest, I'm worn out. Why?
I'll share an example. Today, I got to hold the sweetest 4(ish) month old baby for a good little bit. I got to watch him fall asleep. And I came alive. Example 2. His name is Valor, and he's 2 years old. He saw Chelsea (twin) at church when he first came in and got really excited and was smiling and pointing- then when he looked closer he realized it wasn't "Bennen" and got sad. But when I waved- he got excited again. And I came alive.
So why am I worn out? Because one of the things I desire is not yet mine. I am content and fully aware that God will bring- first, a husband into my life at the right timing. And after that will bring children. And that He has the perfect plan, timing, and man for me. But it's this waiting process that I get a little tired. And this afternoon as I held the baby and then later on played with sweet Valor I realized what made me come alive. Pretending to be a mom.
I also talked to a mother today about her young daughter who was very nurturing. She said she got her a kitty so she'd have something to take care of... brilliant! The mom is helping her daughter develop one of the sweetest personality traits/ gifts in her life. And that is exactly what I need to do. God has given me this gift. He has given me this desire and love to care for a husband and children. But in this time of waiting- I can help "nurture" other things. I can always play pretend mommy. There are plenty of things and people that need to be loved. So I will do just that. I am no longer worn out. God will show me and teach me how I can make an income doing this...... or he'll reveal another passion in my life... I am certain of it. :)
AND..... this waiting process is actually an anointing process..... maybe I'll blog about that soon....
I will add that I am horrible at laundry. And I apologize to my husband and my kids in advance for it. Maybe by then I'll be good at it. ;)
I have blogged myself through this dilemma. Score.